“Cinderella Never Asked for a Prince, She Asked for a Night Off and a Dress” ~Kiera Cass

For little girls fairy tales are magical things. Many want to grow up to be a Princess falling in love with Prince Charming and live the classic “happily ever after.”

This is a great goal. Unfortunately, most little girls don’t end up having a royal wedding, living in a castle, and growing old in a “happily ever after” lifestyle. Life happens. Life gets busy, the house gets dirty, and bills need to be paid. At times life is rough, sad, happy, and joyful all at the same time.

When I think of classic fairy tale, Cinderella, I think of her being just an exhausted girl who needed a night out on the town. When she wanted to go to the ball she wasn’t looking for Prince Charming. She wanted fun. I applaud her for this. I don’t think she would have exactly been looking for happily ever after.

What is fun about life, is it is unpredictable. You can meet the most interesting (or boring) people anywhere. Cinderella had to be open to meeting a new person. Yeah, you may not have married Prince Charming or live in a castle or had a royal wedding, but you can still meet amazing people. Cinderella wasn’t looking for a Prince – she wanted a night off. I encourage you to have fun and be open to new relationships.

Beautifully Broken

Good orchestrates beautiful things. Recently I have had the opportunity to go to a bible study with other ladies of all different ages and backgrounds. All I can say is this bible study is filled with G-ds Kadosh, and he’s teaching me alot through it.

Typically at school I am around “Good Christian” students and staff.This is a great thing but most of the time there is a lack of those around me being real or open about what’s going on in there lives. Personally, I tend to get very frustrated with this mentality.

As I mentioned earlier G-d orchestrates beautiful things. Four years ago, my life was a complete mess. Three years ago my life was a mess. I’ve tried to get things together but even last week my life you guessed it…is a mess! It’s been a mess, but at the same time it’s been a beautiful mess. Recently G-d has countlessly blessed me by putting people in my life that I can minister to because of my story. My journey has not been an easy one. It has had steep hills, rocks, cacti, and ice. But it’s been the same way for the ladies in this small group. It’s been a different path for each one of us, but none of them has been easy. I am so amazed how G-d is able to take what I would consider a “mess” or “broken” and yet restore it into something amazing. I am learning to be greatful for the struggle because he is doing something beautiful with it to transform your life and possibly others lives too. This group has been great for me because the members are teaching me what I just stated. Does that mean that I have faith that everything will be okay all the time? Ha no. It’s still difficult most of the time. But I have a new element of trust in G-d, because I am starting to see beauty in brokenness through the blood of Christ.

Keep a biblical perspective of life, but also remember to see things as beautifully broken.


The Good, the Bad, the Bald

Well, it’s 3:15 AM on a weekend night and I should be working on homework but I found some inspiration somewhere and I know I just need to blog where my mind is pondering; my thoughts are going in a completely different direction than my research paper I’m working on tonight.

Earlier, I was reading a magazine and it had a section on random women’s cancer stories. In a way, I’ve watched my mom go through her own ‘cancer story,’ but at the same time not really.

In 2008 my mom was homeschooling me and my mother’s  friend noticed a bald spot on my mom’s head. Worried and scared she made a appointment with our family doctor, and after that a dermatologist. After a quick test at the dermatologists, she was officially diagnosed with alopecia. Though she was never in life ending danger, I tearfully watched her go through life changing challenges.

Personally, as her child it was hard to watch someone you love have a change such as this in their life.
As the young daughter’s perspective – life was hard. Losing your hair isn’t a big deal until you watch a woman do it.

The first time she went wig shopping, I physically got sick after the appointment. I didn’t want to tell or talk to the few friends I had about it. I did not know how to approach the topic with anyone besides immediate family. Most girls go and get their hair done with their moms; I went wig shopping. We hugged, we cried, and we got through it,l. Eventually she overcame it with many prayers and even healing, though the doctors said she’d never heal.

Besides the idea of my mother being completely bald, as an elementary student I had to get use to the thought that because of genetics, I’ll probably face alopecia as well. Last fall my thick blond hair started dramatically thinning. Before this started happening, it took at least half an hour to straighten my hair. Within a matter of weeks, it only took me five minutes to straighten my hair. Thinking I already knew the results, I went to my family doctor and was referred to a dermatologist. My results? At this time in my life I just had hair thinning I was put on a medication to slow it down but several months later I stopped taking it because of the possible long lasting affects the medication would have on my body if I took it for a extensive amount of time. Today my hair is thick, healthy, and occasionally has dye in it.

To this day, I am not looking forward to the day I am told that I’ll be bald for the rest of my life. But I know that if G-d allows this path for me, it will be for a reason and everything will be okay in the end.

Just a few days ago G-d really encouraged me with this. A year ago I was worried I had alopecia, but recently I had the opportunity to pray for a young little girl whose hair is falling out mysteriously. As silly as it sounds, being able to pray with her helped me realize, if I am diagnosed in the future, I will have others in my life who will lay their hands on me and pray for me, just as I did one night with a group of delightful ladies for that precious little girl.

I can’t hold onto something that might not be G-d’s will. I can’t count on having thick hair for the rest of my life; the same way I can’t count on growing up and having a white picked fence and a dog in my yard. I have to grateful for what I’m given – all of the good, bad, and ugly because G-d is with me all the way no matter what happens in this crazy thing called life.

Lama-Leah readers, through the hard times He is teaching you something and there’s always something to be grateful for. Blessings.

He Always Has A Purpose…Alopecia

When I was ten years old I watched my mother’s life “change for the rest of her life,” but today I realize what the doctor and her friends told her about her life changing for the worst was the exact opposite.

For my tenth birthday my parents gave me the present that I had been asking for FOREVER! That present was…a dog! My parents told me that 1) It had to come from a pound or a breeder (my family DOES NOT support puppy mills), 2) I had to take responsibility to the new family member and 3) I had to train him and show him in 4-H.

On my birthday my parents took me to a couple of the surrounding animal shelters around town. I didn’t know what kind of dog I was looking for but I knew that I would know him when I saw him. Hours of looking at different canines — old, young, big and small — I found my dog! To my parents the dog that I wanted had the most funky style of black fur, kinda ugly, and thin. What I saw? An angel who was meant to be my dog!

 Moe cropped

My family had troubles with my new pet, Moe, but over time we figured out how to take care of my new family member.A few weeks after I adopted Moe my mother started having health troubles. Suddenly, her beautiful, thick hair started to vanish and her hair started to thin rapidly. A friend of hers pointed out that she had a bald spot and at that point she decided to visit her family doctor. The family doctor was pretty sure he knew what it was, but he referred her to a dermatologist to try to be absolutely certain. At the appointment the dermatologist pulled out a sample of her hair and said, “I’m sorry but you have alopecia. You will go bald and be bald for the rest of your life.” Alopecia is an auto immune disease that affects mostly toddlers and teenagers and often times runs in their family. Though in other cases, older generations can be diagnosed with it. It does not affect the recipient in any other way other than obsessive hair loss and then complete baldness and in most cases it will never come back and if it does, it most likely will come back in a couple of months. It was devastating to my mother! WOMEN FIND THEIR IDENTITY IN THEIR BEAUTY.Since her diagnoses I’ve watched her be essentially bullied from family, certain “friends”, and random strangers because she wears a wig or when she doesn’t wear a wig she has awkward bald spots.Watching my mom be “sick” I have quickly realized how much women judge strictly on appearance. My mom has not had an easy path by any means when G-d allowed her to become “sick.”

Almost one year after she was diagnosed G-d did something to encourage my family but especially my mom. I found out that my dog with “crazy hair” had Chinese crested in him. The Chinese crested dog is bouncy, sometimes stubborn, and primarily bald just the way my mom is. In December 2008 G-d answered the many prayers that many had been praying for. I was rubbing her head and…she had hair for the first time in a long time! Fortunately, she had a full head of hair again in a short matter of time. Unfortunately, the alopecia returned again and she is now fighting again. My mom has not let this stop her, though. She continues to fight and prove to society that beauty is not only on the outside, and inspires me to make the world a better place, just as she often teaches me to.