Initially, with all the wonderful things in life, I found my voice as a writer and individual when I was LOST. For the past year and a half leading up to August 2017, I was barely employed. It was a trying season for me as I felt discouragement on many different levels in life. From fighting my own inadequacies, to essentially being without a job for over a year and a half, and confiding in anyone and everyone instead of those who I am closest to.
Last year I was significantly lost. I didn’t see clearly, and I was too stubborn to verbalize my need for help to the ones who mean the most to me. So instead, I turned to the community with my fears and anxieties in life, which was both a beneficial and a negative thing. I turned to the community, and I turned to my notebook and pen.
Though I would vocalize some of my fears to people, I would also press myself to spill it all out and navigate it on paper. On paper I did not have to go to my family, or friends, or people within the community, and I didn’t become what I felt like was a burden to those whom I spoke with when I word-vomited whatever I was going through at the moment.
So, out of adversity, confusion and being lost — a voice for poetry was born. It led me and taught me how to be honest and raw with myself. Through writing, I found in me the things I value and the things I hate. Through it, I am learning to celebrate them all. Learning to love myself and others better through this magnificent magnifying glass I have been given.
Though it is cliche to say, if you are out there and you are lost, this time may honestly be rough and challenging, but perhaps it’s a special time that has been granted to you so you may encounter the gold within you. Whether it be your voice or something else that may come about from the time you are enduring. Maybe the dark times in our lives are only here so we can encounter the genuine light within us and others.